Have you had these weird thick, white rain events? (I refuse to call it snow.) They’ve stopped now, I hope. But I got caught in one a couple weeks ago. I was driving to see dad and all of a sudden, I’m in a white, whirling mess and can hardly see. Only lasted about two minutes. Still, it left me feeling strange and unsettled. I hate seeing white stuff on the daffodils and forsythia. ‘Course it’s spring in Maine. Anything can happen. Spring, winter, spring all in one day (or even one hour) is par for the course. Happened to Charlie last week while he was walking Scamp. Snow Squall Snow squall bearing down on …

You know you’re old when: you go to bed fine, wake up the next morning, and your back is out. you stand up after sitting for a while, and you have a little Walter Brennan thing going. (If you don’t know who Walter Brennan is, this probably doesn’t apply to you. Yet.) you bend your knees a bit when you sneeze to “protect your back.” you sustain a napping related injury. You know, you wake up, stretch real big, and pull something in your neck. you take a car ride and stop somewhere to go the bathroom, and it takes you all the way to the door to stand up straight. Along with fat migrating …

A few weeks ago now, we had this wicked wind storm. Why, some of them gusts were “kill-a-witch” strong. Meaning strong enough to pick up our double-wide and drop us off in Oz! Charlie and me hardly slept all night. Thank goodness Scamp isn’t anxious in a wind or thunder storm. He saves his Nervous Nellie act for when we’re in the car. ‘Course once things settled down, the yard was a mess. Thankfully, that’s Charlie’s department. See, we have a separate but equal approach to chores. For the most part, I take care of the inside of the house and Charlie takes care of the outside. There is a little crossover. We do the …

Every house project takes at least two, three, four times longer than you think it’s going to. The box that says “all parts included” is lying. You dive into repairing that little bit of rot outside the front door and discover it’s the tip of the iceberg. And don’t even get me going on window treatments and paint chips! Experience has taught me that if Charlie’s going to be attempting one of these little chores, it’s best if I’m out of the house. So Saturday, when Charlie announced he was going to install our new bathroom blind, I called up my sister, Irene. We went for a window visit with dad down to Mahoosuc Green. …

Sometimes it seems like being cranky, whining, complaining, and moping are the glue that holds us together. There are whole television programs devoted to it. And hey, I get it. We have a lot to be cranky about right now. Still gets on my nerves, though. Charlie, too. Cranky Don’t Cut It This fella Mel, who’s on my shift The one who operates the lift? Of all the guys we’re employing Mel’s become the most annoying ‘Cause if you need complaining done Mel’s your fella, he’s the one Who’ll get the other fellas riled Me, as well, it put it mild How he prattles, all day long ‘Bout everything that’s going wrong The roads, the …

I used to hate getting “Ma’am-ed.” You know what I’m talking about. “Are you ready to order, ma’am?” Sometimes, I’d even say, “Did you just ma’am me?” Being called ma’am is a sign of respect if you live down south. But up north, it just means you’re old. But now, I seem to have progressed to a whole other level. Ma’am has become “dear, “hon” or “Miss.” That’s the one I hate the most. “Miss.” Like I’ve become so elderly, I’ve traveled past ma’am and am back where I started. Charlie’s noticed it, too, but being called “hon” by the gals waiting on him seems to put a bounce in his step. I don’t have …

Hard to tell what goes on in other people’s marriages, but sometimes you wonder. Can’t help it. There’s this couple from away that Charlie and me see when we’re out and about. They’ve only been in town a couple of years. We don’t know them and I haven’t been able to dig up much info. I think they pretty much keep themselves to themselves. Charlie and me have nicknamed them Fred and Ethel. About the only time we see them is when they’re out walking or riding their bikes. We’ve never once had just a Fred or just an Ethel sighting. Nope, it’s Fred and Ethel together, and Fred is always smiling. Ethel is friendly …

Charlie and me had a nice, quiet Christmas, just the two of us. (As a cashier down to the A&P, I’m on the front lines, so no socializing with loved ones inside for me.) Yes, it was kind of lonesome, but we zoomed with my sister Irene and her family and my dad down to Mahoosuc Green. That helped. We took a long walk with Scamp on the 24th. I cooked us a nice roast pork dinner with homemade applesauce, twice baked potatoes with sour cream and bacon, a green bean bake and a pineapple upside down cake for dessert. Yum! It poured on Christmas day, just like on Thanksgiving. So, 2020, right? But hey, …

Last Saturday, I run into Mikey’s Meat Market to get some bacon, went to order, and realized I was naked! No mask! I have never done that before. Sure, I’ve forgotten my mask, remembered halfway to the door, then had to go back to my car. But I’ve never actually walked into a store without one. The weird thing is, it felt unnatural. I went to order, realized what I’d done, covered my mouth with my hand and said, “Oh my God! I forgot my mask. I’ll be right back.” And I dashed outta there. It’s amazing how we’ve adapted to a new normal. It’s not always easy, though. Here’s Charlie’s latest. Where’s My Mask? …

When your dog gets excited, does he sneeze? I read on the internet, it means that they’re happy. Well then, our dog Scamp must be extra happy because when we’re getting ready to take our morning walk Charlie, Scamp, and me, our little fella turns into a sneezing fool. I mean, one sneeze right after another. It’s kind of funny unless you’re running late, then it’s kind of irritating. That’s because Scamp’s not a multi-tasker. If he’s sneezing, he can’t do anything else. Especially not sit still to don his halter and leash. Charlie was so taken with this trait, he wrote a poem about it. Hot to Trot Imagine you’re so hot to trot …