After two months off, due to my eye situation, I finally returned to the A&P last week. Felt like a kid going back to school. Don’t know what I’m talking about? Check out this post. It’ll bring you up to speed. Returning to the A&P was like coming home. It put some normalcy back into my life, and I can’t tell you how good that feels. I’m still getting used to my eye not being 100%. I thought the bubble would be long gone by September. “They,” meaning the internet, said these sorts of bubbles are usually absorbed back into your body in six to eight weeks. Eight weeks was September 1, and my bubble …

I ran into my old friend Joan at the DQ the other day. She was ordering a banana split. “Hey there, Joan,” I says. “What are you celebrating?” (See, I knew it had to be a special occasion. I mean, you don’t order a banana split for nothing, right? Joan goes, “I just went for a stress test. You know, to check out your heart. Make sure you’re not about to keel over.” “Oh, I’ve never had one of those. Were you nervous?” “You betcha. Number one, I don’t like to break a sweat. Ever. And B, I’m not what you’d call real athletic.” “I hear you.” “Still, I wanted to ace the test. Mostly …

You can’t underestimate the power of a good night’s sleep. It’s true for kids, and personal experience has taught me, it’s true for seniors, too. What with my eye situation and the heat, sleeping good has been a challenge for both me and Charlie. ‘Til last night. I’ll let the Poet Laureate of Mahoosuc Mills tell you all about it. The Couch She’s pitching about Like a boat on the sea And pulling the covers Right off of me A night without sleep That’s what I’m dreading I know exactly Where I am heading The couch That is where I always go The couch When she gets to fidgeting so An island of peace Where …

For the first time since 2009, I’m forced to take a break from sharing what I’m up to, my musings, and Mahoosuc Mills news. Over the weekend, I gradually lost the sight in my right eye. It was wicked scary! Turns out, I have a detached retina and have to have emergency surgery tomorrow morning. The surgery doesn’t take that long. But the recovery does. Get this: I have to be face down for a week. I can walk around, as long as the back of my head is toward the ceiling. Cute! I have to sleep on my side or stomach. The second week, I get to sit up for short periods at a …

This week, I stopped by Wicked Good Stuff, our little thrift shop in town, to drop off a few of things. I mean, how many mugs with logos do you really need? I also donated a  pasta maker I got at some Yankee Swap a few years back. Never did figure out how to use it. Plus, hello, you can get the fresh stuff already made down to the A&P, so why bother? I also threw in a pair of black sandals with bows that were so cute, but honey, every friggin’ time I wore them it was pure torture! It always feels good to bring stuff to the Wicked Good. First off, I love …

Me and the Dairy Queen have a love/hate relationship. All summer long I love it, and the rest of the year I take its name. Let’s just say my skinny jeans and the Peanut Buster Parfait are like Patty Duke and her cousin. They’re never seen in the same room at the same time. In the spring when the DQ opens, I start off with the Peanut Buster Parfait right out of the gate because, you know, I missed that delightful mix of vanilla soft serve, hot fudge sauce, and peanuts. It’s a sweet and salty taste sensation, and I enjoy every bite. Then I scale it back. When Charlie and me ride over to …

They’re back! Yes, I’m pleased to announce that black fly season is officially underway here in Maine. If you’re from away and unfamiliar with our black flies, oh, you are missing something! Have you ever laid on your back looking up at the clouds, and you start seeing shapes in them? Well, that’s what we do with the black flies here in Mahoosuc Mills. One day last summer, I’m out planting my window boxes and, swear to God, I see this shadow moving across our double-wide. I look up, and sure as shooting, it’s this whole swarm of them, looking one minute like the silhouette of a rabbit, the next like King Kong. Or maybe …

“Charlie, what’s up with the beach towel in the bathroom?” “Geesh, the ones we’re using are the worse for wear, kind of thin and scratchy, so I thought I’d give that one a go instead.” “You’re right, Honey, we do have an Econo Lodge situation. I’ve been too busy to deal with it. But things have quieted down. I’ll get right on it. You know how much I love a shopping assignment.” “That I do, dear. Make sure they’re dark.” “Dark?” “You know, so they won’t show the dirt.” So, off I went to the big city, Bangor, solo. It’s not really the kind of shopping excursion you bring a friend on. Ended up getting …

Saw Franny Ward at the A&P the other day. Franny’s having the time of her life down to Mahoosuc Green, our senior living facility in town. She must have been squeezing in a little grocery shopping between all them classes in flower arranging and exotic pole dancing. Franny is in her early eighties and is always dressed to the nines. This particular day she was sporting a fushia t-shirt with “Born to Sparkle” written in big, sparkly letters across the front. Wow! As if this wasn’t enough, the rest of the shirt had sparkles all over it, too, front and back. Just then, one of our new summer cashiers, Destiny, sidles up to me and …

So the other day, I’m working at the A&P, ringing out Pearl Plaisted when I notice she has on the cutest pair of angel earrings. “Pearl,” I says, “look at those angel earrings. Aren’t they just adorable?” (See, I believe if someone is looking sharp, you should tell them.) Pearl smiles. “Got ‘em down to the Dollar Store. Fifty cents!” “That is a bargain at twice the price! Oh, and look at your angel pin.” “Ida,” she says, “this is my guardian angel. I’ve taken to wearing it ever since that incident down to Home Depot.” No one else was in line, so I shut off my register light, “Do tell, Pearl!” “Well, Hank and …