Charlie come up with a corker this week. Gosh, I love that guy! My BarkaLounger Dream Fishing, that’s what I was doin’ On a lake I’d been canoein’ Water was the only sound No one else for miles around A brand new plug I’ve never tried Pabst Blue Ribbon by my side There I was, doin’ fine Felt a tug on the line Suddenly a children’s scream Destroyed my Barcalounger Dream Destroyed! Kablooey! Demoed! Blasted! Dream was lovely while it lasted Neighbor’s pool, that’s the spot Where kids all gather when it’s hot And shriek with all their kiddie powers Just goes on like that for hours What a bunch of little brats! Imagine adults …

Quit Beefin’ About It

So last Wednesday, I’m having Celeste, Rita, Betty, Dot and Shirley over to the house for a little birthday celebration for Celeste, right? Got the place all spiffed up. I wish I could be more relaxed when entertaining, but I just can’t. It’s important to me that everything’s looking good, clean and tidy. Set the table the day before, so I don’t get jammed up last minute. Splurged on some fresh flowers. Everything’s looking pretty, darn near perfect when I leave for the A&P that morning. See, I get out of work at 5:00, and the girls were coming over around 6:00, so wanted to be able to hit the ground running. Had an uneventful …

A kitchen faucet is something that you use a lot, right? So when it’s running slow, it can be a real pain in the patootie. There you are, wanting a cup of tea, and it takes forever get enough water in the teapot. I mean, you have time to take a nap. It may be irritating to me, but poor Charlie sees that slow running faucet as his own personal failure as a husband. He’ll take this annoyance for so long, then it reaches a tipping point, and off he goes to Petey’s Plumbing with the problem piece. That’s the end of the faucet that you can screw off and it has a little screen …

I don’t really have anything to add to this little ditty Charlie wrote for me. Thanks, honey, you made my day! Stick With Stuff You Do the Best For every nest up in the trees Each bird’s got their specialties Same as us, down below Some of these you prob’ly know: I’m the one who mows the lawn And rakes ’til every leaf is gone But without her, doing laundry, Boy, would I be in a quan’dry! While she lets me hunt for mice She keeps the whole place looking nice Bathroom is all spic ‘n span (Count on me to plunge the can) Trash is not an irritation Haul it to the transfer station …