Saturday night we went to the bean supper down to the Congo Church. If you’ve never been to one (and that is a sad state of affairs), you usually sit family-style at big round tables. Well, at our table was a couple who’d obviously had an argument before the shindig, and had not left it in the car. All through dinner, they kept sniping at each other. Wow! Is that ever uncomfortable. There’s a big difference between sniping and some gentle ribbing. What is that difference, you might ask? Well, I’d say, it’s about whether you (the person doin’ it) are motivated by love or wanting to make the other person feel as miserable as …

A few weeks ago, my niece Caitlin called me up and asked if she could come over. “Needed my advice about something.” I could tell she was upset. “Sure, dear, I’m here. Come on over. I’ll heat up some water for tea, and have my Certified Maine Life Guide Magic Moose Antlers at the ready!” “Thanks, Aunt Ida.” Poor Caitlin said this with a little hitch in her voice, like she was tryin’ not to cry. Charlie looks up from his paper. “What’s up?” “Oh, that was Caitlin. She’s comin’ over in about an hour for some girl talk.” “Trouble in paradise?” “That’s what I’m guessing.” Charlie downs the rest of his coffee, and gets …

The longer I’m married, the more I realized that sometimes, men and women have completely different ways of lookin’ at things. Like a few years ago, out of the blue, Charlie says to me, “Ida, you know what we need?” “A complete kitchen make-over?” “Smaller.” “Hmm, I don’t know. A set of Fiestaware?” “No, a boot brush?” “A boot brush?” “You know, put it by the door? Has a brush on top? You wipe your boots on it before coming into the house.” “Oh, I’ve seen those. You mean like a little porcupine, with a brush on its back?” “Well, I don’t know about a porcupine. Just your basic boot brush.” “OK, Charlie, I’ll look …

I’ve heard that rich people find it kind of tacky to talk about money. But for the rest of us, well, we gotta. I’m not saying you need to be hashin’ it over morning, noon and night, but you and your spouse do need to be on the same page in this department. Otherwise, it can be the one thing that does you in. I learned this the hard way when Charlie and me first got married. Neither of us were makin’ much money. I was workin’ down to the A&P, of course, and Charlie was at the mill. He’s a foreman there now, but he started out at the bottom doin’ odd jobs. We …

Charlie came home from work last Friday, and I could tell he was a little thrown off. Usually, I got dinner all set out for him. “What’s up?” he says, staring at me with my coat on and ready to go. “Don’t you remember? Caitlin’s art opening?” “Oh, Jeez…” Clearly, he hadn’t. “Come on, Charlie. It’ll be good for us.” See, my niece Caitlin and her boyfriend Adam are part of this group art show at To Bean or Not to Bean, Mahoosuc Mills’s very own coffee shop and performance space. Just opened up in one of the old mill buildings last fall. I don’t think they’re going to put the Busy Bee out of …

Over the weekend, we went to a great Valentine’s Day Brunch at Betty and Pat’s. It was the usual suspects: Celeste and Bud, Rita and Smitty, Betty and Pat, Dot and Tommy, Shirley and Junior and me and Charlie. The food, I must say, was out of this world! I mean, what’s not to like about a meal that includes bacon and mimosas? Afterwards, we’re sittin’ around the livin’ room, enjoyin’ the wood stove and swappin’ stories, you know, like only old friends do. And because it was Valentine’s Day, these stories had a kind of lovey-dovey theme to ‘em. Junior told the one where he and Shirley were neckin’ up to Makeout Point, and …

I was talkin’ to my sister, Irene, the other day. “What do you have planned for this weekend, ‘Renee?” “Nothing!” she replies, a big smile on her face. “Jimbo’s off snowmobilin’ up to Presque Isle, so I have the whole weekend to myself.” “Oh, that sounds heavenly! What’re you gonna do?” “A whole bunch of nothin,’ Ida. Binge watch “The Good Wife,” maybe. Give myself a facial and mani-pedi, if I have the energy. Catch up on my Oprah magazines.” “You’re killin’ me! And on the menu?” “Haute cuisine. Popcorn and Junior Mints. That’s as far as I got.” “That’s a good start. And let me just say for the record, I am totally jealous!” …

Today’s the day, people: the official cut off for Christmas decorations. And none too soon. Why a couple of weekends ago, Charlie and me were drivin’ home from the Brew Ha Ha, and I became a little irritated. “Would you look at that?” I asked. “What?” Charlie replied. “All these Christmas decoration everywhere. It’s the middle of January, for God’s sake!” “You say that every year. Besides, technically they have ‘til Groundhog Day.” “I know, but the real Christmas-y stuff should come down sooner, in my opinion. Like look at that place there. It’s just not right.” Charlie pulls over in front of the house in question. “What are you doing, Charlie?” “Why don’t you …

An incident happened this weekend I’m not proud of. In fact, I’m a little embarrassed to share it with you. But hey, it’s just us, right? So, picture this: it’s late Sunday morning. Charlie’s snorin’ in his Barcalounger. Scamp’s with me in the kitchen, dozin’ on his doggie bed. I’m putterin’ around, minding my own business, when all of a sudden, I feel one comin’ on. You know what I mean. Nobody ‘cept the dog is near, so I just let ‘er rip: long, loud and unapologetic. A real twenty-one gun salute. “What’s that?” Charlie yelps, nearly fallin’ out of his chair. “Don’t know,” I yell. “Must be a car backfiring.” Could have been my …

The other day, I had the misfortune of seeing some photos taken at our New Years day brunch at Celeste and Bud’s. Rita got a new digital camera for Christmas, and while I’m happy for her, it was like spendin’ the day with the paparazzi! The posed shots are OK ‘cause you have time to assemble your parts and put ‘em where you want ‘em. You wedge yourself between a couple of friends and turn sideways. That makes you look thinner. Then you suck in your gut and do the Princess Diana bit. You know, tilt your head down a little and look up. This kind of camouflages whatever double chin action you got goin’. …