Holy cow! Are there a lot of stunk bugs this year, or what? You know what I’m talking about. Those brownish bugs about a ½ inch long that appear in your house toward the end of September, beginning of October. The ones that, if you upset them or, God forbid squish them, they emit a terrible odor? It’s a smell that lingers, and (get this) attracts other stink bugs! I know! Where’s the justice? You try sealing everything up, but they’re sneaky. They say on the internet that stink bugs are harmless. But are they really? The irritation alone is enough to raise you blood pressure. And, as you know, I have a wicked sharp …

Candy Corn is not a vegetable. I know. It doesn’t seem fair. If it was, let me tell you, Doctor Oz would be very proud of me right now because I’ve been managing to squeeze in at least five servings of candy corn per day. And that’s before lunch. The thing is, I don’t even like candy corn that much. I mean, what is it really? Well, I looked it up, and candy corn is made up of sugar, water, corn syrup and marshmallow, so it’s just packed with nutrients. Get this: a “serving size” is supposed to be 19 pieces. Seriously? I have a bottomless bowl of candy corn at home and every time …

I’ve been missing my mom a lot lately. Some of it has to do with the fact that it’s October, her birthday month. It’s also the anniversary of her death, in a couple of weeks. But it’s more than that. Missing is strange, isn’t it? I can go days or even weeks without thinking of my mom, then I see her handwriting on a recipe, and bang! There she is. Or I watch a little girl, all dolled up for her first day of school, holding her mom’s hand, and I think, “I miss you, Mom.” I used to get a little pang of envy whenever I’d see my friend Rita scoring a piece of …

The poet of Mahoosuc Mills strikes again. Boots Need Waxing Boots need waxin’ once a year ‘Specially if you’re hunting deer Any decent goo will do “Moose snot” is what we call it, here It kind of looks like that to us. To use it, you don’t have to fuss: Brush your boots off to begin, Then gob it on and rub it in Your huntin’ day will not be blotted If your boots are good and snotted Mine were not when we set out And I went on my own to scout  These tracks that started leading me Around this big, blown-over tree On down a hill with rocks and such And through this …

Sad to say, yard sale season is just about at an end for this year, but there are still bargains to be had. I was out browsing around the area with Dottie last weekend, seeing if we could score some last minute deals. She’s always looking for stuff for up to their camp. “You mind if I bring Scamp?” I ask. Scamp’s our little dog. Cute as a button, if I do say so myself. “Nah, bring him along.” Scamp just loves being part of the pack. He’s happy to go anywhere, anytime. And you know what? The little bugger is a great negotiating tool. Softens up even the most tight fisted seller. If I’m …

Okay, it’s Labor Day, and even though the summer flew by and I’m not ready, I’ve decided to focus on the positive. September is one of the nicest months of the year here in Maine. It’s full of clear, sunny days free of humidity, followed by those crisp nights, just perfect for snoozing. All of a sudden, the tourists have transformed from exasperated parents with their cranky, sunburned kids, to retired couples, kicking back and living the dream. And you can actually get a parking spot on Main Street! Me, I always get that back-to-business shot of energy ingrained no doubt from years of school. Years of September representing new outfits, new notebooks, and a …

I thought I’d try something different this week, and do a video blog. I’ve been studying up on the fall fashion trends. Here they are in action. Enjoy! That’s it for now. Catch you on the flip side! Coming Up This Fall  November 9-11: Makin’ Whoopie!, The Public Theatre, Friday at 7:00pm, Saturday at 3:00 & 7:00pm, Sunday at 2:00pm, Lewiston, ME December 10: A Holly Jolly Holiday with Ida, The Footlights Theatre, 2:00pm & 7:00pm, Falmouth, ME December 11: All New!, A Holly Jolly Holiday with Ida Kittery Lion’s Club (sponsored the Kittery Historical and Naval Museum), 7:00pm, Kittery, ME Check out my full schedule here. Join my mailing list. I’ll let you know when a new blog post goes up, where …

Last Saturday morning, our household was up earlier than usual. Charlie was going canoeing with the boys for a few days, and Scamp and me were gearing up for our little spouse-cation. I made eggs and toast for Charlie, sending him off in style, then Scamp and me went for a walk. It was going on 5:30 AM by then, and still dark outside. I don my reflective vest and grab the poop light and off we go. One of the things I love about my fourteen pound personal trainer is that he gets me outside and moving every day. This particular morning, it was in the mid-forties: crisp, clear, and blissfully quiet. It feels …

Is it too early to switch over your clothes? I don’t know! Once minute, you’re eyeing that cable knit sweater. The next, it seventy degrees out. Same goes for that batch of soup you made on Friday when it was so chilly out. Then, you had to freeze it because it got hot and muggy. Early fall is funny like that. But, I don’t really mind it all that much. Heck, I’ll take every scrap of warm weather I can get! Charlie and me walk Scamp every morning around 6:00. But since the days are shorter now, it’s dark then. That means we have to don our reflective vests and Charlie brings what we call …

I’ve never seen as many dead squirrels in the road as I have this year. How about you? Charlie hasn’t written a poem in awhile, but this squirrel situation made him come out of retirement. Dead Rodents Everywhere! Walking Scamp along the road ‘Twas like a battlefield we strode We couldn’t help but stop and stare: Dead rodents everywhere! Squirrels a-plenty, chipmunks, too And there were more than just a few Critters free of all enslavement Plastered there upon the pavement Acorn hunting in the street Doesn’t always end up sweet They just don’t get alot of warning From commuters in the morning Caffeinated, running late Who has got the time to wait For some …