We’re closing in on the first of the year, and none too soon, huh? Boy, working down to the A&P, I’ve seen some mighty stressed out people, let me tell you! No need to name names. You know who you are. And if you’re not one of ‘em, you’ve seen ‘em, too, I’m sure. Men on a mission, running in to get that one last thing their wife forgot. With the eye of the tiger and no time for hellos, they dash into the produce section or down an aisle only to appear at the express lane five or ten or sometimes fifteen minutes later, deer in the headlights, sweat on their upper lip. You …

It’s Christmas Eve day. My husband Charlie and the boys, Bud, Smitty, Pat, Tommy and Junior (a.k.a. the Husbands of the Women Who Run With the Moose) are out delivering presents. See, every year we have this tree down to Town Hall with stars on it. On each star is a request for a present from a kid in town. You know, a kid whose family needs a little help. Anyone can go down there, take a star, buy the present, wrap it and drop it back to Town Hall. If there are any stars left over, the Knights of Columbus buy the rest of the gifts. Then, on December 24th, Charlie and the boys …

I just love Christmas. I love the whole holiday season. From Halloween to New Year’s, it’s just one eating opportunity after another! What’s not to like about that? In our house, Charlie and me sing the “Twelve Days of Christmas” a little different, so I thought I’d share it with you. I’m no Dolly Parton, but I’m gonna give it a shot. Personally, I’ve always found the song a little long, so I’ll cut right to the chase with the twelfth day of Christmas, Maine style. On the twelfth day of Christmas, My Charlie gave to me Twelve lovely roses Eleven Klondike bars Ten toes a painted Nine Powerball tickets Ate at Bonanza Seven Eleven Slushy …

I don’t know about where you live, but up here in Mahoosuc Mills, seems like the minute Turkey Day was over, folks were flying into Christmas. Big time! It’s starting to look mighty festive, and you can’t help but being swept up in it. Across the street, the Phinney’s put out their crèche, and it’s beautiful as ever. And Hank and Pearl Plaisted have really gone to town with them icicle lights. Hank seems to have recovered from his pre-Thankgiving pneumonia, but he’s slowing down, that’s for sure. Ever since he took that header while hanging lights a few years back, they let their son-in-law do all the ladder work. Hank stays earth bound, thank …

Ran into Pearl Plaisted at the A&P this week. She was doing a little pre-holiday shopping. “Hi there, Pearl,” I says, as I’m ringing her out. “I see you’re gonna to be making some pies for Thanksgiving.” “Yup! Desserts are my department. My daughter Sally cooks the main meal. Oh, and I’m responsible for the homemade cranberry sauce.” “Yum! I bet that’s good. Where’s your side kick?” I ask, referring to her husband. “Haven’t you heard? Hank’s in the hospital.” “He is?” “Pneumonia.” “No! How long’s he been in?” “Since last Wednesday.” “That’s terrible!” “Well, he’d been feeling punky for a couple of weeks. Then, he’s in the bedroom, taking a nap, when I hear …

I was looking through old photo albums the other day, when I come across this Halloween gem. I don’t know what Irene and me were supposed to be, but it must have been some cold and crappy out. Check out the winter coats and boots. If you look close, you can see Irene has a knit hat on behind her cat mask. Maybe that’s why she’s holding it up, instead of wearing it. (That mask was probably a tight fit with the hat on.) I think I see the hint of a hood behind my mask. And what’s up with Irene’s cape, with the dancing circus dogs on it? My biggest concern when I look …

Why am I seeing apples on trees and yesterday at the Rite Aid, Halloween candy? That’s just not right! Summer just got started! The older I get, the quicker the seasons pass. Well, not winter. That one tends to linger, doesn’t it? While sweet, sweet summer is like a blink of the eye. Granted, this summer was a hot one. How hot was it? Well, it was so hot, you break a sweat just sitting there watching the tube. It was so hot, you could fry an egg on the sidewalk, bacon on the hood of your car: sizzling! It was so hot, my house has become a no underwear/no shoe zone. Just a loose …

Did you give up something for Lent? That used to be a big deal, didn’t it? I don’t think people do it so much, now. Seems the older I get, the harder it is to come up with something to abstain from during Lent. It’s not that I’m so pure. It’s that I’m so boring. All the food stuff I can think of (candy, ice cream, bacon), I shouldn’t be eating anyway. I’m not that big a drinker. And things like snapping at my husband, cursing and being judgmental, well, I should be watching out for those all year long. And giving up sex? Well, that’s a little extreme, don’t you think? Look, me and …

Charlie wrote this poem after our first snow. I saved it to share now because this is how I feel about New Year’s Day. Saved By the Bell Remember in school, them happy days when You were stuck in some class that just wouldn’t end? Some stupid subject you had to learn And after Teresa, it was your turn To stand up and somehow pretend that you cared Again you have managed to come unprepared You’re startin’ to sweat, you’re gonna get hell When ring-a-ding-ding! You’re saved by the bell Into the fall, one of my biggest peeves Is havin’ to deal with our acre of leaves Oak leaves and maple, pine needles, too Hours …

Christmas Eve, what did you leave out for Santa? Cookies? A sandwich? Chocolate? Or even better, what did you feed Santa’s reindeer? Carrots? Apples? When my friend Dot’s husband Tommy was a kid, they’d leave out dog food. I think is kind of weird. I mean, these reindeer are magical beings! They can fly, for God’s sake! One year, when Betty’s kids were small, they left out some cookies, a glass of milk. That night, Betty and Pat were so busy putting together a new train set, they forgot to put away Santa’s treat. The next morning, they discovered that the dog Daisy had eaten the cookies and spilled the milk. The glass and plate …