As you probably know by now, me and my friends, Celeste, Rita, Betty, Dot and Shirley (or the Women Who Run with the Moose, as we call ourselves) get together once a week for a little girlfriend time. Been doing this since Moby Dick was a minnow. God, we have some laughs! Like last week, we buzz on over to the all-you-can-eat-buffet down to the Hukilau Polynesian Restaurant. We just love going there. It’s so, I don’t know, exotic. We order our usual: a couple of pupu platters, then on to the buffet for egg rolls, fried rice, lo mien, and some kind of meat on sticks (we don’t ask questions). The girls split a …

In my book, The Sweet Life, I have a whole chapter devoted to sex. Hey, it’s a book about love and marriage, so it had to be done. Doesn’t quite have the same pizzazz as when we were younger, but it’s not half bad. I’m no Dr. Ruth (I’m short, but not that short), but bottom line: I’m a firm believer in doing whatever you need to do in order to do it. I’ll spare you the details. Oh, and fantasize all you want about whoever you want, but just don’t act on it. My friend Rita learned this the hard way. Rita works down to Smitty’s Hardware, which is owned by her husband, Smitty. …

Spoiler alert: I’m going to tell you the whole plot of this flick, so if you plan on seeing it, you may want to skip this post. The Women Who Run With the Moose (me and my friends Celeste, Rita, Betty, Dot and Shirley) went to see the Barbie movie over the weekend. Since you’re reading this blog, this is probably no a surprise to you. Goes without saying, we all wore pink. Easy for me, as pink’s in my color wheel and I have quite a bit of it in my closet. But it was a stretch for Shirley. She’s more of a purple kind of gal. Oddly, the guys expressed no interest in …

We celebrated Dot and Tommy’s fortieth wedding anniversary over the weekend, with a big blow-out up to their camp. We had lobsters and steamers, coleslaw, macaroni salad, corn on the cob, ambrosia (I brought that) and homemade biscuits. And the desserts? Oh, Mister Man! Don’t know if I was more buzzed by the sweets or the sugar-free Jell-O shots (gotta save calories where we can)! Oh, and Junior made his famous bean hole beans. Ever had ‘em? It’s a guy thing ‘cause, you know, it involves digging a hole, filling it with old tire chains and playing around with fire for a good three hours. The woman helps out a bit,  prepping the beans, getting …

So, I’m standing at the check-out of one of them new, “old fashioned” general stores, clutching a bag of penny candy, when I suddenly spy the fudge counter. What a dilemma! The Women Who Run With the Moose (me and my friends Celeste, Rita, Betty, Dot and Shirley) take field trips from time to time, and we were on our way home from a whirlwind shopping excursion to the outlet malls in North Conway. Plum tuckered out from all that bargain hunting, we needed a little nourishment to fuel our trip back to Mahoosuc Mills. That’s when the store appeared right on cue. We piled out of Shirley’s Bonneville and went in search of sustenance. …

The Women Who Run With the Moose got together for our girls night on Thursday. Betty was hosting and she was serving nachos and these skinny watermelon margaritas. Oh, they were wicked tasty! Right from the get go, us girls were talking a mile a minute, per usual. Hard to get a word in edgewise, but I managed. “So last Saturday, I was at the baked bean supper down to the Congo Church,” I begin, “and who do I run into but Eleanor Purdy.” Celeste goes, “That old gal must be pushing ninety.” “Eighty-eight next week, she told me. Heck, she pretty much announced it to everyone there. Still lives at home. Well, she was …

For years Charlie has teased me about how often I go to the bathroom. But nature (and age) have finally caught up with him. Charlie has come to realize what the Women Who Run With the Moose have known all along: if you got a chance to go, go! You never know when the next bathroom opportunity will present itself. Our motto is: Carpe pee-um! Here’s his latest. Sir Leak-alot You need things like beer And coffee to live But liquid goes through me As if I’m a sieve Of course that is why, Wherever I am, I’m always the guy Looking out for the can Restrooms, yup, they’re What I seek alot That’s why …

Today is one of my most favorite days of the year. That’s right, baby: January 2nd. Sure, I love the holidays. Who doesn’t? But like with anything sweet, you can have too much of a good thing. You know it. I know it. And my fat jeans know it. Who am I kidding? Right about now my fat jeans are dangerously close to becoming my skinny jeans. Yowzah! It’s time to put on our leggings and settle in for a long winter’s nap. After all the food, fun and festivities, it’s nice to get back to a routine. I love a routine! Some might call it a rut, sure, but not me. A routine is …

Got together with the Women Who Run With the Moose last week for our usual girls night. Dottie was hosting. The menu consisted of a big salad, mac and cheese, and Pumpkin Spice Martinis. Yowza! For dessert, we had leftover Halloween candy. I had to buy my contribution, of course, because someone (not Charlie) ate all ours. We talked about how kids just don’t trick or treat like they used to? “Too be fair,” I says, “it’s probably hard to wear a mask with a helmet on.” That got the girls going. Shirley made one of them kitty litter cakes for her Halloween party at work. What a hoot! You ever seen one? Well, check …

I was looking through old photos, and I found this one of me getting ready to celebrate my fourth birthday. Looks like quite a party, huh? There are little cartoon characters on the tablecloth and the ever popular pointy hats. And I’m dressed to the nines, of course. Some things never change. I still like dressing up, but I’ve become more of a tiara and boa kind a gal. And I like celebrating my birthday the entire month of May. One day’s just not enough! Besides, I gotta pace myself. Now me and my friends Celeste, Rita, Betty, Dot and Shirley (aka, the Women Who Run With the Moose) get together once a week for …