I was looking through old photos, and I found this one of me getting ready to celebrate my fourth birthday. Looks like quite a party, huh? There are little cartoon characters on the tablecloth and the ever popular pointy hats. And I’m dressed to the nines, of course. Some things never change.
I still like dressing up, but I’ve become more of a tiara and boa kind a gal. And I like celebrating my birthday the entire month of May. One day’s just not enough! Besides, I gotta pace myself.
Now me and my friends Celeste, Rita, Betty, Dot and Shirley (aka, the Women Who Run With the Moose) get together once a week for a little girlfriend time, that’s a given. But when it’s one of our birthdays, we try to do something special. The birthday gal gets to choose what. Lot’s of times it involves a field trip.
My birthday was Saturday, and inspired by that old photo, I told everybody what I really wanted was a good ol’ birthday party, just us gals.
“I’ll host,” Betty says, “but it’ll be more fun if we have a theme.”
“How about an Ensure tasting,” Shirley quips.
“What’s that?” Rita asks.
“Kind of like a wine tasting, only for the elderly!”
“You oughta know, Shirley,” I say. “Seeing you’re three months older than me!”
Celeste chimes in, “How about a Botox party?”
“Walker and cane demonstration?” Dottie adds.
“We could chip in and buy Ida one of them walkers with the seat for when she gets tired,” Shirley says, cracking herself up. “Decorate it for her.”
“I’ll crochet a little bag to put on the front, for her stuff.”
“Streamers for the handlebars.”
“Very funny,” I manage to squeeze in, because those gals were on a roll. “Here’s what I’m thinking: a ‘Pamper Yourself Party.’”
Betty jumps in, “Oh, I like that! We could do mud masks, hand scrubs.”
“Foot soaks with scented bath salts!” Rita adds.
“OK, OK,” Shirley says. “But let’s talk about the important stuff: food! What do you want to eat, Ida? And what kind of cake?”
“No cake, no entrees. I just want appetizers and desserts. And ice cream, gobs and gobs of ice cream.”
“And drinks,” Dottie says. “We’re gonna need libations, you know, to help us relax.”
“We’re on it, Ida”
The party was Friday night. God, did we have a good time! And laugh? I nearly split a gut!
My niece Caitlin and her friend Ajiah from down to Mahoosuc Health Food are going for their reflexology certification. I don’t really understand the whole thing. I guess different parts of your feet represent different areas of your body. Anyhoo, it’s kind of like a foot massage. The two of ‘em have to practice on a certain number of people in order to get their certification, so we invited them over to work on us. And Caitlin and Ajiah were all over the aromatherapy thing, too, let me tell you. They had the diffuser going, and they were using them essential oils on our feet. Was it ever heavenly!
At one point, Betty looks over at me and goes, “Can you imagine our husbands doing something like this?”
“Oh yeah,” I reply, “pounding down the Pabst Blue Ribbon and chomping on fried pork rinds while they give each other foot massages.”
Needless to say, it was a fabulous party with the greatest group of gals! And get this: my birthday month is only half over!
That’s it for now. Catch you on the flip side!
IDA’S PODCAST: BIRTHDAY GIRL
Next Performance
May 26: The Best of Ida, The Castle on the Charles, 7:30pm (doors open at 6:00, drinks and light menu), Rochester, NH
August 6, 13, 20, 27: The Best of Ida, The Footlights Theatre, 7:00pm, Falmouth, ME
August 10 & 11: I Married an Alien!, ACT ONE Summer Festival, Friday at 7:30pm, Saturday at 2:00 and 7:30pm, Portsmouth, NH
Check out my full schedule here.
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I love entertaining groups, small and large! The following are wicked fun for after lunch, after dinner, rewards banquets, keynote speeches and what not.
This is a bunch of my favorite stories from all my shows, plus brand new ones. I custom design this program to meet your needs in terms of length and can feature subjects of interest: friendship, men, marriage, health, weight, life in a small town, seasonal stories, you name it!
The Moose in Me, The Moose in You
Move over Oprah! I have found my “inner moose” and become a Certified Maine Life Guide. After years of “Running with the Moose”, I’ve picked up a few pointers. And you know what? It turns out, you can learn alot about life from a moose. In this motivational moose-terpiece, I’ll cover topics from A to Zumba, and offer helpful hints on to live a happier life.