Charlie come up with a doozy this week, an anthem of sorts. It’s part confession, part bragging, and not a word of it is true. Right! Think: semi-truck with a cracked muffler.
I Snore
I snore, I know
Everyone has told me so
I sputter, I snort
Not a very glowing report
I tried elevatin’
Our old box spring
Squirt something up my nose
But it doesn’t do a thing
I snore, so what?
I wish that I could keep my mouth shut
But I can’t, I’ve tried
Even though I sleep on my side
I wake up all alone
My wife got up at four
She fled to the couch
Couldn’t take it anymore
While some, get paid
To serenade, I snore
Got a situation, a little complication
After nighttime falls
There’s snickering, sure
From the folks next door, who
Always like to tell me
They can hear me through the walls
I snore, it’s true
I guess there’s nothin’ I can do
In dreams, I soar
But to everybody else I snore
At camp, they make me
Sleep out in the shed
Yellin’, “Pipe down, fella,
Or you’re gonna wake the dead!”
OK! Enough!
I’m hangin’ tough
On this, bed frame
I’ll stake, my claim
I peep, I roar
I sleep, therefore
I snore
That’s it for now. Catch you on the flip side!
Hear Ida Tell It: Charlie Puts Descartes Before the Horse