Along with this blog, I started writing a “Dear Ida” column in the Moose Megantic Gazette awhile back. I know! Wicking fun. I thought I’d share this letter with you because it’s a classic. It’s already been in the paper, but in case you missed it, here it is:
Dear Ida,
My wife don’t think I’m sexy no more. What do I do?
Concerned in Calais
Here’s what I said:
Dear Concerned,
Who do I look like? Dr. Ruth? I’m short, but not that short!
You want to know how to get your sexy back? Well, let’s see. A man vacuuming, that’s sexy. (Am I right, ladies?) A man snoring away in his Barcalounger? Mm, not so much.
For us gals, time, attention and affection are key. You want to get your sexy back? Kiss your wife hello and goodbye for a week. Give that a try. I dare you!
While you’re at it, thank her for doing the things she does every day, like the dishes or cleanin’ the bathroom. Don’t make a big deal about it, just do it, and watch what happens.
Gals, listen, this goes for you, too. It don’t take much to thank him for mowing the lawn, painting the trim.
And this is a big one: if she’s spent time making a meal or getting dressed up, say something. Compliment her, even if you feel she’s missed the mark. You’re rewarding effort, not outcome.
And, if your wife hugs you, never ever break the hug first. She’s hugging you for a reason. You don’t have to know what that reason is (and you probably don’t want to know), but just hang in there those extra few seconds. Believe me, it’s more important then getting down to the transfer station or whatever.
Or how about this? Ask her out on a date. (And going together to get a moose lottery ticket don’t count.) Heck, you knew how to do this when you were just starting out, right? So it can’t be that hard. And remember: your date has to involve at least one thing she actually likes doing.
Love, Ida
That should keep him busy.
That’s it for now. Catch you on the flip side!
Hear Ida Tell It: How to Get Your Sexy Back
Ida has a new show!
September 8 & 9: Makin’ Whoopie!, ACT ONE Beyond Festival, http://actonenh.org/ Friday at 7:30pm and Saturday at 2:00pm & 7:30pm, Portsmouth, NH
September 15 & 16: Makin’ Whoopie!, ACT ONE Beyond Festival, http://actonenh.org/ Friday at 7:30pm and Saturday at 2:00pm, Portsmouth, NH
September 29 & 30: Makin’ Whoopie!, The Footlights Theatre, http://www.thefootlightsinfalmouth.com/ Friday and Saturday at 7:30pm, Falmouth, ME
Also coming up in September
September 18: Book Reading, Franco-Amercian Centre, http://umaine.edu/francoamerican/University of Maine, 6:00pm, Orono, ME
September 19: Book Reading, Old Town Library, http://old-town.lib.me.us/ Tuesday Forum Luncheon: 11am-1pm, FREE catered light lunch is served from 11am-12pm with presentation from 12-1pm, call to reserve, Old Town, ME
September 19: Book Reading, Dirigo Pines Retirement Community, http://www.dirigopines.com/ 7:15pm, Orono, ME
With Caitlin’s help, I’ve finally learned to update the schedule on my website. Check it out here: http://www.idaswebsite.com/schedule/