I had a hankering for some banana bread, is how it started. So I bought three bananas when I did the grocery shopping last week. You need ripe bananas for banana bread, so I set them aside thinking, I’ll make the bread this weekend.
I says to Charlie, “I’m saving these bananas for banana bread, OK?”
No reply. “Charlie!” I hold up the bananas. “I’m saving these bananas for banana bread.”
“Heard you the first time.”
“Well, sometimes it’s hard to tell.”
“What do you want to me to do? A cartwheel”
“No need to get sarcastic. A simple “OK” or “yup” would be sufficient.”
Again, nothing. Honest to God! It’s enough to drive a woman to distraction. So, I walk over to the coat closet door and shut it. This is a game we play. Charlie is constantly leaving it open, and I’m always shutting it.
So anyways, back to the banana bread. I found a recipe on the internet that’s real tasty. I cut out some of the sugar, so it’s not too sweet. See, I take a coffee break down to the A&P around 3:00, and a piece of that bread and a cup of coffee is the perfect pick me up.
Saturday, I got busy with other things, so that left Sunday morning for baking. After church, I thought.
Well, as it turns out, I got up a little later than usual. That’s because I woke up around 4:00 in the morning and just couldn’t get back to sleep. Kept thinking about things: errands I have to run, meals I’m planning for the week. When I start thinking about what I’m going to wear on Halloween down to the A&P, I get up, drink a glass of milk with a little maple syrup in it, skim the latest People magazine, then climb back into bed around 5:30. Went out like a light. Didn’t even hear Charlie get up. The alarm woke me at 7:00.
Before I pour myself a cup of coffee, I notice there’s only two bananas in the fruit bowl.
“Charlie, you eat a banana?”
“Half of one, yeah.”
“I was saving those for banana bread!”
“Well, we were out of berries and I needed some fruit for my cereal.”
“Don’t you remember? I was saving those for banana bread.”
“I needed some fruit for my cereal. You still got two and a half.” He goes to the fridge and gets out a Tupperware with the remains of the third banana. “Here.”
“That’s more like a quarter of a banana, and it’s not enough. You need three bananas to make banana bread. I can’t believe you did that!”
“Oh, come on.”
“It’s one thing if you forgot I was going to make banana bread, but the fact that you remembered, and did it anyway! This make no sense to me.” I walk over to the closet door, and shut it. “And what’s so hard about closing this closet door?”
“It don’t bother me if it’s open.”
“Well, it bothers me. I can’t believe you ate that banana. God, the skin was almost entirely black.”
“Nah, it was fine inside.”
“But why would you do that?”
“Ida, it was half a banana. Let it go.”
“Honest to God!” is what I said. What I was thinking was, I married an alien. A genuine an alien!
That’s it for now. Catch you on the flip side!
Hear Ida Tell It: The Banana Bread Incident