Have you ever been driving around, pass a house and think, I wonder if they’re having a yard sale, or if that’s just how they live?
Or someone walks by you at the mall and you’re like, Geez, Louise, are they wearing perfume or is that bug dope?
There are entire days where I just wondering around in my head. I wonder what I’ll make for supper? I wonder if I have time to clean the bathroom before I leave for work? I look at Scamp, and he’s staring off into space and I wonder what he’s thinking. I wonder if that’s a look of concentration on his furry, little face, or is it just gas?
When I wonder what Charlie’s thinking, I’ll ask him and more often than not, he says, “Nothing.”
And I wonder how he can truly be thinking of nothing when they are so many things to wonder about. It’s the same when he’s been out with the guys. “What’d you guys talk about?” I ask.
“Nothing.”
“I find that hard to believe.”
“Why.”
“You were gone for two hours. You must have talked about something.”
“Nope.”
“No?”
“Look, when we’re together, it’s about having a good time: period. Anything else is just too much information.”
Honest to God!
Now, a lot of my wonderings have to do with fashion, as in “I wonder what were they thinking when they put that on?” The number one offender in this category is the misuse of leggings. Don’t get me wrong. I love leggings. They are wicked comfortable, and can be real cute paired with the right shoes and top. I’ll give folks a pass on the shoes if they’re not quite right, but the top is where things can go horribly wrong.
Generally, I’m not a big rules kind of person, but some rules are there to protect you and/or the general public and that applies to the leggings rule. Listen up, people: when wearing leggings, pair them with a top that is the proper length. How do you find that length? Well, I’ll tell you. The top should come do to the tip of your fingers when you place you arms at your side. Easy peasy! There’s no need to be walking around with your butt hanging out.
The second offender in the fashion category is the cargo short. Men love these eye sores. Wonder why? They have a lot of pockets. And yes, they do. Can’t argue with that. But honey, if you want to carry around a bunch of stuff, get a man purse. Or how about a backpack, currier bag, or Sherpa? Just get rid of those darn, ugly shorts!
Anyhoo, I could go on, but I need to get ready for work. So, I should start wondering about what I’m going to wear, and if we’ll have a busy day today down to the A&P? I wonder if it’s going to rain. Should I shut the windows before I leave or take my chances? I wonder.
That’s it for now. Catch you on the flip side!
Hear Ida Tell It: Wondering Around
Upcoming Book Events and Performances
October 11: A Visit With Ida, GFWC Maine State Conference, 7:00pm, Auburn, ME
October 25: Book Reading: The Sweet Life, Bailey Public Library, http://www.baileylibrary.org/ 6:30pm, Winthrop, ME
December 3 & 4: A Very Ida Christmas, The Footlights Theatre, http://www.thefootlightsinfalmouth.com/ 2:00pm, Falmouth, ME
December 13: A Holiday Visit with Ida, Kittery Historical and Naval Museum, http://www.kitterymuseum.com/ 7:00pm, Kittery, ME